TWO Years and Counting...

It's official. I have had MS for the past 2 years, as of September 5, 2012.

To some it has flown by. For myself? I can't say I agree.
It has been a long two years and so much has changed. I have changed so much. Learned more about myself that I ever may have wanted to and or thought I could.
Looking back it's been good, summers have been great and a sweet way to break up the year. The people I have met, especially this summer, and old friends I have gotten to know better has been really sweet and encouraging. They are relationships I would like to continue on with for sure!

Well... what is new with me? 
Yesterday I had my last first day of classes ever! That is definitely exciting.
I am doing my placement this semester in Fort St. James in Northern BC. I am really excited to get out of PG for a bit and experience a new hospital.

Things I have learned in the past TWO years:

1.  I have learned perseverance by finishing 3 years of nursing, especially with many points where I did not think I'd make it through.  

2.  I have learned independence by moving out officially on my own! (with friends.) 

3.  I have experienced much more of the world, travelling to London twice as well as Northern Ireland. 

5.  I have felt valued while working as the photographer/videographer for Echo Lake Bible Camp.

6.  I have  battled MS on a daily basis and so far have come out on top. 

7.  I have practiced counting it all joy when faced with trails of many kinds. 

8.  I have done my best to remind my self that I have to live life one day at a time and live it to the full. For me this means doing things like learning to Fox Trot, throwing around a baseball with friends until I cannot see the ball anymore, exploring train tracks, playing on bridges in the fog, sharing hidden secrets of Prince George with friends, and going for runs at 9:30 at night with my roommate.

9.  I have learned to not take life so seriously and to laugh always.

10. I have learned that crying and feeling sorry for myself is a waste of energy that is better spent being productive, sleeping, exercising etc.

And what is coming down the pipe for me? 

Well, on September 22 I head back down to Vancouver for my third trip this month and to START THE GOOD DRUG!!! I don't know if you understand how excited I am about this - I have heard some amazing things about this drug and my neurologist talks so highly of it. I have a friend who started back in April and she told me the other day how she worked 8 hours, worked out, did yoga, made dinner and at home in the evening and wasn't even tired. Things like that make me cry when I think about it.

However, as excited as I am about this new drug I also am not putting ALL of my hope in it, as there is a chance it might not help. All I can do is wait and see, right?

As I have said to some people before, looking back I am so happy to see how far I have come. I am not saying its been easy, but I will say I've had good days and bad days. I do my best to make the good days out-weigh the bad ones, but sometimes I need to take a break and reflect on the good/great things in my life.

I am so thankful for the things God has taught me over the past while, depending on Him, living life the way He wants me to, and counting it all joy. I am unbelievably thankful for those around me who have supported me in my journey with MS. Having people trust in me helps me remember that I can do succeed in life and that I don't have to be run by MS.

So thank you, for continuing to read my blog, pray for me, think of me, support me as I continue to navigate these foreign waters.

Love, Kate

HIGHLIGHTS OF 2012-2014

 

 Leaving for London the first time!

I love these two! Always up for the bant

         ....when you have moments like this.            Steroids...not always my favourite.

If I could live in mud I would. 

 This is what made some early mornings this past year worth it

Sista Time! Waiting on the parents...

Spent a weekend this summer at the base of Mt. Robson. 

I LOVE adventures... this one was a highlight of the summer. 

I know its good when I get this reaction from Tim.

3 inches away from highway traffic flying above our heads

 Mt. Robson- Kinney Lake

Glaciers are always a neat thing to explore. 

Northern Ireland Adventures

Heel clicks--always a classic. 

I was constantly blown away by the scenery in NI. This place was one of my favourites. 

Queens University, Belfast, Northern Ireland. 

Worked on star trails this summer. 

Double Barrel 20G shotgun. I actually hit my target... in thet air!

 Friends, lakes, rivers, creeks, forests, inukshuks, hanging out on the beach...

 I wouldn't give back these moments for anything! 

Sometimes I just like being 10. With a bear towel! 

The last night of camp this summer: took advantage of a clear, cold (-2), frosty-sleeping-bag kind of night.
The view in the morning was incredible, as you can see. 

Highlights of 2012-2014

Quick Update_Summer 2k14

Well, this has been a fantastic summer so far. I have been what feels like everywhere. From the north coast having dinner at the most well like restaurant, The Ramore to standing in the same rooms that Winston Churchill spent most I his time fighting the war. From there admiring Big Ben to spending a weekend at the base of the Rockies near Jasper. It has been amazing.
I also have been spending the majority of my summer doing what I absolutely love which is taking pictures and making DVDs for kids at camp.

Again this summer I am working at a Bible camp called Echo Lake Bible Camp. It is west of Prince George about an hour and a half. It's been so good. Many of he staff have returned from last summer and brought more friends with them.

My aunt the other day was asking if I was going I send out support letters this summer, and unfortunately I did not have the time to do so. However I will update this a bit more and would love to put up some prayer requests and if you would like to support me in prayer or financially both would be greatly appreciated.

Prayer Requests:

1. Fatigue continues to be a struggle especially when at camp and my brain does have to be working all day thinking about what's next to take pictures of to how am I going to put the video together. I still aim for bed at about 8:30 which does help.

2. To sleep well. I have been sleeping great this past week but it seems to come in phases. When I nee the sleep the most it feels like it's more of a struggle.

3. Getting my mind back in the thing for uni. I am getting a bit stressed out and really not looking forward to going back to uni. As well as not knowing what the end of my fourth year is going to look like. Just scary.

4. As August finishes it bringing me to my two year mark on my clinical trial for my MS drugs. Which means that I get switched over to the real and very good drug. It is very exciting. However it also means that I have to fly to Vancouver lots which is not ideals, especially during uni. So prayer that the instructors who'll be understanding and helping as it takes about a month with 4 trips to fully switch over.

Well thank you so much for taking the time to read this and pray for me for the remaining of the summer.

If you also would like to help support me financially the address for echo lake is:

Echo Lake Bible CampBox 137
Fort St. James BC
V0J 1P0

Have a great summer!! 

xx Kate

But I Don't Wanna....

"But I don't want to be side awake at 5am" She said to herself as she looked at the clock thinking it HAD to be later than 5am.

Oh well, I guess it means I can be productive and then maybe go take a nap in the sun later today.
Wow what a month may was. Getting up at 5 was a normal occurrence and then heading off to work at 6. It was great, I was able to met a bunch of great nurses and watch some super cool surgeries and increase my 'wit'/cheeky response time immensely.

However, as great at this past month was the next 3 are looking to be quite class!

June 6-7: Finish my steroid rounds. (not the best of times, but it will be good in the long run)
June 7: Fly out to Vancouver for adventures

June 11-15: Spend time with family, friends, head up the sunshine coast, go to doctors appointments, possibly head to Vernon.

JUNE 16: Fly fly fly and fly to London, Engl. SO excited! Spend some time with my aunt and uncle and attempt to do my best to get over jet-lag as soon as possible.
June 18: Quick flight to Northern Ireland. Here's hoping that I am somewhat capable at that point of getting to the airports on my own in London. Honestly, somewhat nervous about it, but should be ok.
June 25 - July 3: Come back to London, spend time with family and hitting up as many museums and landmarks as possible.  Highlight: Going to a wedding. But not just any wedding. My cousins wedding. 

The rest of the summer will be camp. Echo Lake Bible Camp. It will be so nice to be able to just hand out with friends. Work with kids. Most of all making videos each week for the kidletts. I am really just looking forward to not having responsibility, homework, tests and everything school related awful!


Highlights of Third Year

Fall Fog Adventures

I loved spending study breaks hanging out along the river with all of the beautiful fog.

                 

Stayed creative with maternity projects

        

Had some doctors appointments down at UBC MS Clinic. Always nice to get out of the snow in PG. 

These always made for an interesting day. 

Hung out with my wonderful friend Katie. 

Spent time with my 'pups'. Adventures. Adventures. Adventures with 2 kiddies.  

This became known as a 'Kater Duckie"

                                                                                   

Played with the worms. Her brother dried all of his out in a bucket. 

We went camping and it WASN"T -25 below 0!  Who knew it could be so wonderful!

Got infested with ants. 

Had many an early morning this past month.

But the fog, again, was worth it! Always great!

Well a touch of my year. Love parts of it. Detested other parts. But I made it through. Passed everything and had a great last placement! 

Thanks for checking in. Will update you guys later this month!

Kate

"Are You Happy?"

"Are you the happiest you've ever been?"

That was one of the questions my friend asked me yesterday. It took me a second to think about it, I thought about the past few days, months, year. Everything that had happened to me in the past year or so...

[ms.boyfriend.ms.shcool.friends.living in prince george. ms.life.clinical.exams.ms.practicums .camp.summer.friends.university.exams.summer.family.ms.moving] 

These things flashed through my head as it did that I asked the question again out loud, 

"I am the happiest I've ever been?" 

I then thought about the past week/weekend, it continues to put a smile on my face, almost makes me cry, but mostly smile. I spent the past two weeks complied classes and exams. I have moved into my new house for hte next year which is with my best friend and her brother in a basement suite. 

But the best of all since school was this past week. I spent it and will continue to spend it in Quesnel until the beginning of June. 

I don't think I could have picked a better practicum spot that Quesnel-PAR. I am in the post anesthetic recovery ward. So when patients come out of surgery they come to us and we take vitals and give pain medications, and make sure they are ok and stable. I also had the opportunity to spend some time in the operating rooms. It was so cool and so great! The staff are fantastic--some of the best I've had to work with so far in my degree. Very willing to help, teach and assist me in learning. I don't know at this point if this is where I want to be. But I do love it. 

It is a really great feeling when I feel so affirmed in choosing a career such as nursing. Helping patients feel comfortable, holding their hand before surgery, laughing with (or at) them, cleaning them up. I love it. I was talking about my practicum yesterday and as I started I could feel my excitement increasing and my facial expressions changing. I had to tell myself to calm down a bit and I don't need to get that excited about watching a 'skin graft or mole removal or hammer toe fixed.' 

Oh, I did answer my friends question when he asked and my answer still makes me think to make sure I was being completely honest...

Yes...yes I am genuinely happy.

This very well could be the happiest I've been in a long time.

At this point I have so many great things to look forward to in the next year. Finishing my practicum, going to the UK for a few weeks this summer. Going back out to camp. Living with good friends. Going into my final year at uni. I'll be graduated by this time next year. I wouldn't say I am thinking there won't be any challenges next year or in the coming days/months.

But I am ready to take it one day at a time and face those challenges more ready than I would have ever been if I had not gone through these past 2 crazy years!! 

It IS Spring

It is spring, or at least in my mind it is. The sandals have come out two weeks ago, regardless of how much snow there is or the fact that it was snowing last night as I went to bed.

I was driving around town today, there was sun, dry roads, good music. I was thrown into a bit of a nostalgic spell dreaming of being 13/14 again. All I have wanted all evening has been to go play outside, shoot hoops, toss around a football/baseball, shoot sling shots or play kick the can.
I was reminded of the days going to my friends' baseball games, watching them play, or get their collar bones broken. :)
I wanted to go race bikes up and down my old neighbourhood and climb trees until the branches broke under my feet.
Oh to be little again, to not have a care in the world, except to be home by supper.


Well, whats new with me, this semester has been craziness. It is clearly the spring semester, lack of motivation, lower marks, exhaustion, ready for summer.
I have been busy and been able to check off at least one more place I do not want to work in the future.
I had my maternity and paediatric rotation since Christmas break. First off, I really did enjoy peds, I had one very difficult experience but in the end it was very rewarding. I found that I really did love working with the children, they made me smile and work hard. It was terrifying but also brought me a lot of joy by the end of my rotation.
My second rotation was maternity, a place of with I do not ever want to work in. Babies are great, (well sometimes) but what is even greater was being able to leave them with the moms and not having to take them home. Watching a birth, again great, very interesting, however not something I am looking forward to doing myself. In any way, shape or form. Oh well, that is the reason for having so many different placements this year, is to figure out what I do and do not enjoy. Maternity, not something I enjoyed.

Now for exams, and my practical tests I will be done for the semester. I then have a week off and then a month of practicum in Quesnel. I will be working in a post-anesthetic recovery unit. I am very excited. It will be nice to be back in an acute care setting.
After my month of practicum I am heading out for the summer, I will be headed back to England with a wee pop over to Northern Ireland. My cousin is getting married and lots of family is flying over for the wedding. It will be wonderful! I actually don't think I can describe how excited I am to go back to England but also travel about in NI. Awk. I will be awesome. I will be staying with friends from camp who are from there, which will make it that much better!

After my trip I will go back to the camp I worked at last summer. Echo Lake Bible Camp.
Here is one of the promo videos I made for them, click here >> Echo Promo <<

I am looking forward to this month being over and summer starting and to getting some normal person time, like sleep and not uni!

Anywho, thanks for checking in!

Kate

I love coffee shops.

I don't love coffee. But I love coffee shops.

I love watching the different people who come and go. I love the smiles I can share with complete strangers. I love it when I know the baristia and he tells me that seeing me in here so often makes him really not want to go back to uni. I love when I see the old ladies come in and discuss their lives with each other almost every morning.

I love seeing the old lady in the corner waiting for her husband to bring their coffee's so they can have a pleasant morning together.

I love engaging with the old lady who I sit down beside and she tells me about her day and how she lives on her own and takes the bus to run her errands.

I love watching the window washer gracefully wash the windows and helping me move my table back when he has to wash the one beside me. I love it when the sun comes out and warms up the whole place.

I love coffee shops. Maybe its just this one. But I love it.

I love that I can just have time to think, process the day, listen to conversations, my music, catch up with old friends who walk in.

I can't say I love coffee. But I love this coffee shop. 

My January

Hey guys, first off I want to say thank you to those who are reading this and who do keep updated with my blog. I absolutely love it and really appreciate it.

Well I wanted to give you a wee update on my January. School has once again started off with a bang. I have started and finished my paediatric rotation. Of which I absolutely LOVED! It was great spending time with kids and playing with them when they were feeling better. Mmm.. it was a good clinical placement. And now on to Maternity. I am also looking forward to this one. It will happen after reading break!

Seattle Ferris Wheel: At Christmas

Sister Time-Waiting for the parents

Busy city, movin' people. Love night photography

Enjoyed Christmas bokeh.

Beautiful winter day in Prince George

Decided to go camping with my bestie--possibly at -25 degree Celsius. 

Looking for a brain break from studying. Could possibly be my favourite spot in Prince. 

Sunset on a glorious winter evening. 

Anyways I am hoping that the rest of the semester is goes well, so far my health has been good. No pain, err, minimal pain in my hands. My fatigue is always there but gets better when I exercise and go to bed early.
The end is in sight for me. Half way through my penultimate year! I am getting pretty excited--then this summer shall be great! I will tell you about those plans at another time, probably closer to the date!

Well I hope you all have a great night!

Kate

Bucket List

Well, I've been thinking, of which I tend to do a lot of these days. But I find I do even more thinking after I have some great conversations with my good friends. Yesterday I had some good conversation with a good friend. Which well.. I think left her thinking maybe more than I did. But I won't elaborate on her thoughts,  just on mine.

First, I have come to really appreciate reflection times on decisions, illnesses, school, life, camp etc. I love being able to talk about these things and have logical thoughts about them. (Vague, yes I know.. but thats ok)

Secondly, there are many things that I am excited about that are coming up that I know about and things that I do not know about, but want to do.
I don't think I have ever officially made a bucket list... but I've always liked the idea of them. I think the problem is for me is that when I get to actually writing these "hopes and dream' down it either seems silly, or I just never have a big enough list to actually make it worth it.

1. See the Northern Lights in a grand fashion--
I have seen them once. I was on the out skirts of town with some friends and on our way back into town this is what we saw. However one day I will see them again...hopefully.

2. Take a StarTrail picture.

3. Go to South Korea-- My great aunt once worked in a hospital in South Korea; I would love to go back and work in that hospital

4. Visit/work in the orphanage that my other great aunt worked founded and worked at in India

5. Become a RN

6. Work on a MercyShip-- a portable hospital that gives healthcare to those who are not able to get the care they need. I would love to be able to give my skills as a nurse to those who need it.

7. Go back to the UK, spend more time in London and also visit friends in NorthernIreland

8. See someone be healed from an illness; wheather it be me or someone else. I would love that!

9. Get married

10. Sleep outside one night (camping) at least once during every season. This would come down to sleeping outside at least 4 times a year.  {this idea comes from a long time ago when my friend and I decided we would do this once a night throughout the year-the coldest -22}


This list will grow, this list will change and I will complete some things but I will have a great time doing it!

Kate

Here we go again.

Dad went kayaking...? 

Slingshot for Christmas

Christmas was nice. I went down to Vancouver and stayed with my parents for a few weeks. It was good to spend time with them. We went to Seattle for a few days which is not really a city I am dying to go back to. Too many cars, too much walking, too much blah. Nothing really stood out to me there and my feet hurt a lot. Which was because of how much walking to different shopping centres that my mother and sister wanted to go to. Super fun :/
But it was good all in all being down south, but I am glad to be home. Well sort of....

Let me tell you about my last week. :D
Firstly...School only started last Monday, it was the longest week ever! And not all in a bad way, but let me tell you about it.

This all started on Wednesday with an email from someone from my uni telling me that I had an outstanding form about my flu vaccine. So I went on a complete which hunt trying to find it... I called at least a dozen people trying to find it, I started at home, went to the health unit, to the hospital, up to the university talked to 3 more people.. finally, 8 hours later I finally had someone to help me.. but at that point it would've been easier to just get another flu shot. Which is what I did in the end, the next morning. Literally I found that form 30 minutes later. Oops.. but really, another flu shot couldn't hurt me  and my already weak immune system.

In the middle of all of this I could not remember where my stethoscope, name tag and student id card was. So on Thursday I cleaned my room, like ALL of it.. and the drawers and camp stuff that i left in my closet. I eventually found it under a pile on my bed, the stethoscope at least.  But my room looked great!

Friday, I just puttered around and read some stuff for school work. I am talking 3 courses this semester.. two of which are online.. Which I don't mind too much. The way the instructors are doing them is nice. And clinical is good too.. paediatrics.
So on Saturday I had orientation. for my peds rotation... started at 7 didn't end until 5:30-6ish. It was only supposed to be a 6.25hour day and only started the math part of it at 4:30. I almost cried when my instructor told us the quiz would take about an hour but we didn't really have time so we could take it home and bring it in at 6:30am the next morning. He, in the end gave us the week to finish it.. but it was all ok.
Sunday, clinical, it was great. I LOVE paediatrics compared to mental health. My instructor was fantastic as well which makes things even better.
Monday, I couldn't find my student id anywhere.. I check cars, pockets, my wallet.. found it in the back of my closet in a bag I hadn't used since last week.. shocker.

Yikes.. it has been nuts. I was telling my friend this whole week today and she looked at me all concerned and said, "You know, you can cry right now if you'd like."
It was kind of weird, that thought hadn't even crossed my mind all week.. not really sure why, but it didn't. Maybe I'm just growing up, or my memory is gone along with all of my tears. :)
However I have also discovered it takes a bit to get me to cry these days.. it happened once last semester about 2 weeks into classes. Nothing since.. well a few tears while I was watching "Eight Below"--that movie about the dog sledding dogs that get left behind in Antarctica. That brought a few tears to my eyes. haha. Made me laugh when I caught it.

But it has been a good semester so far.. kind of nuts but ok.

______________________________________________________________

Hmmm... I know its a process... but it comes in waves.. along with everything else that goes on in my life, I have found that I don't talk much about how MS has really affected my life. I mean most days when someone asks me how I am I will tell them I am tired. But there are more feelings hidden down there. I summed it up nicely over Christmas when my dad suggested that we go to the gym and play 2-on-2 with my brother and sister. My response with humour was "Dad, I don't think either of them want an out of shape blind, disabled girl on their team." He thought it was kind of funny, which it was.. but true. It SUCKS that I can't play sports anymore like I used to. That moment quickly passed and I got over it.

But tonight I was wearing a pair of shorts that I usually wore for volleyball a few years ago, thinking about how things were then, when people would call me up to go toss around a volleyball, or shoot hoops... that doesn't happen anymore. Even if it did I would want to say the same thing I said to my dad, "I don't think you want a blind setter on your team do ya?" Reminds me of a whole different life. One that I miss. I know there are so many great things going for me now.. but I miss those times.  

I also don't think I will fully understand the implications that MS plays in my life. It will come when I want to teach my kids to play volleyball, play badminton in the backyard, go for hikes with them, shoot hoops even. I won't be able to share those moments with my kids the way my parents did with me. It breaks my heart now.. but will break it even more when it actually happens. I know there will be other things, that are good that will happen with my future.. but there are a few times where I don't know what I will do when these moments happen.

Sorry, enough of being sad, because right now I really am not at all. Just thinking.... I am stoked for this semester to be over.. because I have big plans for summer, which one day I will reveal to you.. providing it all works out the way i hope it does.

Thanks guys for reading.

Love,

Kate