London! And More...

Well, as I promised I would tell you guys about my next three weeks. So as of now I am in London, England. (Well actually I'm on the plane at 1:00am your time)
Oh man, I have wanted to come to England and Europe since I was about 10. It is something I have always talked about.. If you have heard my talk about my future honeymoon, it was in my mind always backpacking Europe just like my parents.
My aunt lives here and her and my dad collaborated and decided it was a great time for me to come over. I wasn't about to argue with that either. My aunt has lots of my time planned out already, which I think will be kind of nice, I honestly am not picky. I'm just stoked to hang out with her and see many amazing places.
0309- Half an hour from landing and I am catching myself holding back a huge smile... I am getting so excited, I almost feel like it's a movie.. And that I can't be real--but soon enough it will be.
At this point I almost wish I could just be in my own plane and be able to turn up the music super loud and just have my own dance party.. Which is possibly one of my favorite things these days in my car on my own. : )
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Count it all joy, when you are faxed with trials of many kinds, because the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so you may be mature and complete not lacking in anything.
Looking back still I LOVE this verse. Every time I think about it something new comes up, "mature and not lacking in anything" I don't know about you but lately I have found each new 'problem' as a challenge and find myself looking for a lesson in that... I would also love to challenge you as well: When faced with something that sucks, find the joy, find a lesson, laugh through it. That has been my main way of getting through the terrible situations. My friends, family and I have had a few good laughs about my MonSter on more than one occasion. I also love when someone else teases me or throws something at me from left field and totally surprises me. I want my friends to be ok with it and be able to laugh with/at me.
I also want to say thank you for the responses I have gotten from my blog. Some of the messages and comments that I have gotten brings me great joy. When I was first diagnosed I remembered the blog my family started for Sam. I knew how much of an encouragement that blog was for other people. I wanted to be able to make something for other people in the future to read and be encouraged by. If there are or were lessons, tips, tricks, etc that I could learn and have others learn from them also without being in my shoes then that was my goal, is my goal still. I know it helped one person specifically with seeing how MS really affected someone on a daily basis, gave her a new understanding of MS. Even if it was just for that one person this whole process is worth it for me. Medically, earthy, without God healing me completely I will be stuck with this disease. (I do believe that God can heal me, but right now I still have the disease) I will have this disease for the rest of my life, which I have come to terms with. There are great drugs to look after the symptoms and stuff but no cure-yet. So if I am going to have this disease than why not make the best of it? I'm not saying I always think like that, but God is good, He is faithful and has taken care of me so well this past year especially. I know He will continue to so the same

Summer is Finally Here!

This summer I will be working at camp, as I may have said before, but I wanted to send out a support letter, but I also thought posting the letter on here and telling you a bit about my summer plans and different forms of support I would LOVE from you.

If you would like to support me in any way, please send me an email HERE and I will be able to send you some more information specifically on how you can send support and I would also love to know who is supporting me so I am able to thank you and keep up personally updated on my summer. Thank you so much!

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Dear FRIENDS,

Summer is nearly here!  This past year has been very challenging for me at school and adjusting to living with a serious chronic illness.  Last September, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis.  MS is generally diagnosed in people my age and is a debilitating disease affecting myelin which acts as insulation surrounding nerves.  The worst symptoms of MS are fatigue, loss of vision, loss of feeling in my hands and legs and continued attacks which damage the nervous system throughout my body.  Every patient with MS responds differently to the disease but unfortunately my type is aggressive with very short periods of relapse.  I am participating in a drug trial at UBC which means I inject myself (painfully) with an interferon every other day.

MS has been a difficult adjustment and has caused me to think about my life very differently, in terms of school, my career, time management and much more. I have just finished my second year of nursing in Prince George at the College of New Caledonia. It was a busy year with classroom lectures, labs and clinical rotations at the hospital. It was wonderful to be working in the hospital at least two days a week. I absolutely loved working in the hospital; it was great to feel my career choice affirmed every time I was there.  But it was very hard.

I have been given a unique opportunity this summer. Echo Lake Bible Camp, a small camp in Northern BC near Vanderhoof, needs a camp photographer this summer. I will be capturing the great moments that camp provides for children through games, activities, skills and much more. I am excited about this chance  to spend my summer at camp with a great friend, making new friends, serving God and taking pictures.

I have learned that I cannot do life on my own.  I need help.  God has given me the strength and courage to face challenges in my life.   Please keep me in your prayers this summer.  Constant fatigue is something I struggle with on a daily basis. Also, would you pray that I won’t get any more attacks from MS this summer?  I am hoping to have minimal setbacks over the summer and next year and am praying that the new drug they are testing for MS will be available to me in 16 months time.

I also am going to nursing school at UNBC full time next year and I have saved up about half the money I require for 3rd year.  Would you consider supporting my work at camp this summer by donating to Echo Lake Bible Camp’s student bursary program?  I have chosen to serve God this summer at camp while I am strong enough to work with children and share my gifts with others.  I would appreciate your help so much as I serve the Lord at Echo Lake.

Thank you so much for taking to the time to consider helping me this summer.  Your prayers, support and financial help will make a world of difference in my life and in the lives of the children I touch this summer at camp.

Blessings,

Kate Goertzen                                                                                                                                 goertzen.kate@gmail.com

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Hope you guys have  great day!
On Thursday I will fill you in on what I am doing for the next three weeks! I know I am pretty STOKED!

~Kate

Count it All Joy

Wow, the response from this blog has blown me away, I have heard great stories from different people, I have read encouraging comments and just become even more comfortable with talking about my disease.

But I will give an update on my life as the moment.

So I finally finished second year, passed with mostly B's, which totally surprised me. But wow, does it feel good to be done school. I feel like I can finally breathe a little bit and then this summer is going to be awesome! I am so excited for it--my best friend is coming home and we are working at camp together, I am going on a trip of a life time as of next week. I would honestly really like to say things are looking up, however EVERY time I have said that lately something seems to crash and burn within 24 hours.

Let me tell you about my trip down to Abbotsford a few days ago... So I was talking to a friend the day before and they were asking me how I was doing, I said great! School was done, I was catching up with people, going to Abbotsford and I was doing really good. I had been planning on driving down to Abbotsford the next day and surprising my family by showing up at their school a day early. I left at 7:00 that morning.

7:10--I got to the major intersection by the casino and remembered I forgot my camera under my bed so I quickly turned around and grabbed it. Phew, I thought to myself- that would've been bad to forget something like that. I looked around my room for what seemed like the 10th time that morning and nope, nothing forgot. Then left again.

8:00-- OH CRAP!! At this point I was 20mins from Quesnel and realized that I forgot my medications in the fridge at home. I quickly called my uncle to see if it was possible for him to mail them to my parents house that day. He said yes, and I continued to drive...3 messages and a voicemail later from my uncle again saying that it wasn't possible to mail them. And then another hour waiting to hear from my MS nurse to see if anything was possible than besides driving all the way back home.

9:00-- After, possibly shedding a few tears and feeling quite ticked again, I turned around and for the 2nd time that day driving my LEAST favorite part of the drive going to go pick up my medications.

10:30-- Finally, on the road....AGAIN! Oh well, what else could go wrong, she said to herself with a bit of a laugh...oh, if only she knew...haha

Williams Lake: As I drove through I thought to myself, if only nothing had gone wrong I would be in  Abbotsford by now. Oh well.

2:00-- 20km outside of Williams Lake engine light goes on. This then gives me flashbacks to when I was about 14 years old and we were on a road trip and something happened to our van and we were stuck for hours outside of 100 Mile House. I can't remember why, but we did. So I really didn't need that happen again. So I called my uncle, checked my owners manual and decided to turn around...yet again. This time with even more tears and becoming even more ticked.

2:30-- Found the Toyota dealer, went in and asked if someone could come look at my car... still trying to hold myself together the guy tells me that he probably won't be able to do anything for me until later this afternoon. Maybe it was the look on my face, trying to really hold back the tears and make sure my voice didn't quiver. But he left and came back 5 minutes later and said that someone would come check it out.

3:00-- They come back with my car and tell my the catalytic converter should be replaced, it is losing efficiency. But again, not something I wanted to hear--especially since I didn't even know what that was. And then he told me the price of a new one and fixing it. But by 3:30 I was on the road again and promised myself there was no stopping until Cache Creek.  

6:00-- Cache Creek, time to gas up and then I thought 'Really, one more thing could go wrong today..' So I quickly hopped over to Kal Tire and asked them to torque my tires (I got them changed a few weeks ago).

8:30-- Finally arrived at my parents house. They were delightfully surprised and I was DEAD, tired, back was sore and everything else hurt.

Some lessons learned for the day... I was quickly reminded of one of my favorite verses of the year. James 1:2-3 "Count it all JOY when faced with trials of many kinds..." That was one thing that I kept coming back to that day and I have found that verse many many times this past year.


However, now it is officially summer for me and next week I will be leaving for a trip of a life time.. keep updated and I will let you know eventually what it is. I am stoked.

Anyways, I hope you are having a great day!

Kate

Why Now?

Hey!

So I hope this whole shi-bang didn't come too much out of the blue today... But I felt like many people have been finding out lately (or at least that is what I've heard) and I don't blame you for not saying anything... (not too much anyways.)

I honestly probably wouldn't know what to do if I found out that someone I knew was sick too.

So yes, I had about 8 months of symptoms and little things to point me in the direction of MS but when the official diagnosis came it was a bit of a shocker. It took me a while to figure out how I could manage school, life and MS all together. I also didn't know how to tell the 'world' about it all.

I am still me: I can function as I did before -- just differently. I go to bed earlier than I used to because I am exhausted most days. School: well, it may be a little harder to do as well as I'm used to doing. Sports:  I have tried a few different things to help keep my body temperature cool enough to be able to see a volleyball, basketball or birdie. (Oh, it is an interesting time trying to play those sports these days!) I have come to like swimming because it keeps me cool enough to still be able to see.

I also won't lie to you. This has been the absolute hardest year of my life (yes I know, I'm only 21). But I have been so blessed to have a great life none the less! This year is just the most challenging so far...however I have learned so much. I don't have many reasons for why I tried to keep this news from 'you' and really I don't think I need any. I just didn't know what to say.

But now I am ready.

I want my story to be encouraging and possibly help someone else down the line one day.

What is great about telling you all now is that when I do talk about it, I don't burst into tears or something like that, which then makes it even more awkward for everyone, right? I really don't mind talking about my story at all, so please feel free to ask me if you have question! I would talk about Multiple Sclerosis all day long if I could. It's when I start talking about it that I get lost, and it doesn't feel like I am talking about myself but just talking about the disease.

Here is my story. Here is my new life, here is a different Kate Goertzen, one you may not have known during high school.

Have a great afternoon,

Kate

What's Going On?

I don't know how many of you have heard about my last year... but its been a bit of a crazy one.

I didn't want the wrong story about my new "MonSter" to get told by anyone other than me, :) so this is the place to tell what has been going on. This recent 'development' in my life? IT will tell my story, and how I am doing, what is going on, and is what will dictate the highlights and lowlights of my days...

Read about them here!

So here you go:

September 5, 2012

This has been a bit of a crazy year... Last summer (2011) I realized I failed a very important course in my first year nursing program. Microbiology...hard course and not enough time spent on it. At first it seemed like a terrible thing, but then I thought more about it. Maybe it was a good thing I failed this course. It meant I was able to retake it, finish my electives and then take a semester off and work. I ended up moving back in with my parents whom that summer had moved 800km away from me. I then worked for 8 months in a mental health group home. However this is not why I am starting this blog. So here you go...

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February 2012
VERTIGO! This is one of the weirdest things that happened to me. One morning I rolled over in bed and the whole world spun. I couldn't turn my head quickly, walking in the evenings became difficult, at one point I even fell when trying to get up. I went to my family doctor he asked me a few questions and made me walk in a straight line, heel to toe. He laughed at me. Which was funny, because I actually couldn't do it. I mean, I do know my balance is bad, but this was really bad! He sent me away with a diagnosis of Labyrinthitis and that it should go away in 2-3 weeks. Which it did, 3 weeks later.

March 2012
I noticed when I exercised my eyes got blurry. Well not really blurry, but everything seemed overly exposed, like a picture. It would happen when I would go hiking, or walking down the street with my mom and dog, etc. I think you get the picture. Whenever my heart rate went up, it also became a lot harder to see.

June 2012
All I really remember about this was when I was making supper at my parents house. I remember turning to my dad and said, "Do you think its weird that my feet are numb?" and didn't think anything else of it. But it continued for about 2 weeks: numbness in my feet and half way up my legs. It was on and off but was weird. This left after 2 weeks.

June 30, 2012
At about 3:00 that morning (I was working a night shift) I noticed that the pads of my thumb and first 2 fingers on my right hand felt like they were falling asleep, or  trying to wake up. Numb. Throughout the rest of the day it moved down my fingers and half my hand. Over the next week the numbness moved into the rest of my hand. This hasn't changed to this day.

July 2012
This was a weird month. The numbness in my hand continued, and to moved up my right arm, shoulder and upper half of my torso (posteriorly and anteriorly). I also found out one day at work when I was cleaning up some ice that the coolness felt really good on the numb areas. I went to the lake that month and the cold water felt really good.

At this point I talked to a few people about what these symptoms meant and they all had the same answer. Keep reading.

August 2012
My torso was good. The numbness went away. My arm still felt numb, or at least different than normal. I also started to have trouble doing daily things like buttoning up my shirts or looking for items in my purse and pockets. It was like I couldn't feel textures. I knew I was holding something but I didn't exactly what it was without looking at it. I had to watch myself do the buttons up on my shirt. That  hasn't changed to this day.

I also had some burning in my hand, it was swollen and did not seem to be getting any better.

End of August 2012
I got a phone call from Dr. Thanah's office, a neurologist in Abbotsford. He gave me a neurology exam, a VEP (visual evoked potential). They checked my nerves to see how well they reacted to stimulation and check to see if I had Optic neuritis. At the end of this appointment he asked me a few questions like "Do you have any metal in your body? Are you claustrophobic?" etc. He then disappeared for a few minutes and came back and told me that MRI diagnostics will hopefully call me  soon and will have an opening before the end of the week. (It was Wednesday and I left on Sunday to go back home) As soon as I walked out of the hospital my mom called me and said I had a MRI booked for 7:00am Friday morning. God's plan? I think so!!

Very End of August 2012
I got to go on an awesome trip with my little brother, who also has gone thought a lot in the past 5 years. Check out his story...Conquering ALL He was diagnosed with cancer (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia). Anyways, read his story if you so do desire but this one is about me, so I will continue.

My brother and I got to go rafting on a Teen Adventure with BC Children's Hospital. It was tons of fun, but again besides the point. Oh, I did however meet two great nurses. They were awesome! I only knew them for a short time but really enjoyed their company.

September 3-5, 2012
My parents gave me a few cryptic phone calls and emails about coming down to Vancouver to discuss my MRI with a neurologist from UBC hospital. I do like to think I am smarter than I look and maybe even smarter than my parents think. I knew that if my MRI was negative there was no way they would book a $350 flight to have a neurologist to tell me so. I first tried to get a straight answer out of my dad but he tried to change the subject and was very brief. So I tried my mom. She said that my dad and her would would Skype me that night.

September 5, 2012
I found out I have been positively diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis.

I have Multiple Sclerosis and this is my story.

-Kate